(919) 404-9327 sales@lizardwebs.net

UPDATE: Feb 12,2014

I was contacted by the company that was mentioned below about this post.  They claim to have no knowledge of the person that wrote the email or whatever.  I can actually rather appreciate that as a lot of email marketing is done by affiliates which could easily lead to this kind of cr*p. Perhaps they need stronger controls on their affiliate marketing programs, nonetheless, she was a very pleasant lady.  I have removed her company name as a courtesy to her.  HOWEVER, as I reread it to make sure that company name was out of there everywhere, I could again feel my blood rising about the annoyance of having to deal with these kinds of emails creating a lot more anxiety among clients, causing annoyance for OTHER companies, etc.  I have not changed my opinion on these kinds of emails in the least but no reason to slam the cr*p out of that particular company. For now at least.  I trust I won’t be getting any more SEO review letters of my website from them any time soon.


So here’s what I find in my email box. I’m already irritable today, so this just begged for me to slam the crap out of it. I normally save my rants for my blog – but this one just pushed my buttons today.  Particularly after I saw the errors that this person/company claims they found. And as we see the depth and force of my ire come out below, I did NOT lose any clients or even have any call me today about anything LOL. This is just a built up annoyance at semi-literate companies swamping everybody with authoritative sounding (yet idiotic) emails to the point where no one that you tell you do SEO work takes you serious. Even if there WAS a good use for snake oil, would you EVER buy it??? No, because it is synonymous with huckster and getting burned. And these kinds of bs emails – doing the same thing to the SEO industry. Now the thing is,

1. I know these errors DON’T exist (The HTML – if you have a CMS, you’ll HAVE HTML errors here or there and short of hand-coding every function yourself – read “spend hundreds of hours” – you will have them. Additionally, as browsers and standards change, you’ll have them unless you update all that code. THAT is one of the big reasons we like CMS systems like WordPress.  And do you really NEED to worry about a stray HTML error? I think not – see below.

2. Anyone who DOESN’T do SEO or build good websites COULD be sucked in by this bullsh*t because it sounds authoritative. Throw a few words in there that most people don’t understand, explain (horribly) that their website is failing because of these implied shortcomings on their site – and you’ve got a recipe for panic by anyone who doesn’t know what all this is about.

3.  Horrible horrible English. And you want to correct MY site??  You’re going to try to work all sorts of miracles on my site and you’re apparently having problems even communicating in reasonable English in a short email?   You have GOT to be kidding me.

Here’s the email I got…

Hi,

My name is Anil and i am online marketing Head with <company name removed>. We provide SEO service’s, Google Local Listing (GLL), Web Designing, and PPC for business growth. , I was just browsing the internet and came across your website I found some error’s in the website. Hope you’d like my suggestion for better Growth.

Your site content is sufficient to convince the client but due to some minor mistake you fail to catch better result. Your site ranking and searches is deeply affected due to these errors.  As you know that Google’s crawler is software and work on code base. That’s why site coding portion should be strong for better result.

These errors are:-

Canonical issue: – canonical issue means your site’s same page show different address in address bar. For this you can click logo link or home button it opens with /index . So please get it solved. If your site opens with /index Google count two page of same home page. In the same way if your site opens with www. and without www. For more detail go through suggested page of Matt cuts post http://www.mattcutts.com/blog/seo-advice-url-canonicalization/  and for more information you can go through this video :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cm9onOGTgeM So in such types of problem, Google penalize your keyword ranking’s. if you resolve these error’s it will help growing your business. Here are some of the error’s : – Html Errors, Robots text files updates, xml Sitemap missing. As we know that Google crawler reads coding part of the site. So we should focus on coding portion rather than attractive design portion.   Apart from these issues Title tag and Meta tags are aren’t fix.

Let’s just touch on the HTML error issue

Google HTML errors

Google HTML Errors – Just over 1000 errors on their News page. So tell me again HOW important the W3C standard is?  Then again, if you own the toybox, I guess you CAN write your own rules.

Let’s take a quick look at a site that should be just about perfect in every way – Google. Other than the one page that has nothing but an image and an input box, let’s look at a site that actually has usable content – in the way they supposedly appreciate – rich text and all that. We’ll do a quick check on http://news.google.com/. Surely as the internet masters with their huge staff working around the clock to better the internet – and usually ding us webmasters for any little reason they happen to choose on that day, THEY should have a handle on everything, right? WRONG.

Over 1000 HTML issues on the front page alone right now.  So, again, clue me in why it is important that my HTML is flawless and that is one of the selling points of your SEO come-on? IF the master of everything internet carries over 1000 errors on their front page alone, if I have 19 on my home page, you know what? I can live with it. Should I fix them at some point? If I can outside the scope of rewriting CMS components. And I sincerely doubt that it’s hurting my rankings. And again, I can live with it.

I really would like to know why Google harps at us webmasters about having perfect HTML and yet one of the most highly hit pages on the internet is carrying over 1000 issues on that one page alone.  Makes you wonder doesn’t it? Seem just a bit hypocritical, yes?

A Slow Painful Death is Too Good for the People that Send this Stuff and Waste ALL of Our Time

I honestly just want to ram a hot poker into these people for the general fear-mongering and annoying phone calls that this kind of garbage generates to legitimate companies (like myself) – “Eric, I just got this email that says there are errors on my website. What’s up with that?” So what does that lead into? At least 15 minutes (and usually longer inevitably) either conversing or showing them that there are no appreciable errors on their site – and this time is always uncompensated just to put a client’s mind at ease.  Now, my good clients at this point can spot this bullcrap a mile away and know that their sites are about as solid as you’re going to get (sure we have a hiccup every once in a while but…), but for new customers?  Or of course believe everything they see on the internet, because if it’s on the internet it HAS to be true (OMG).  I shun these type of customers like a vampire does the sun – but I have a lot of customers. ‘Nuf said.

Not that I don’t like talking to customers, but I enjoy being able to talk to them about the gains we’ve made for their SEO standings or traffic – NOT having to explain or prove non-existent errors.

Do everyone a favor – especially your webmaster and/or SEO person

Even if it’s not me, take these SEO come-ons with a whole LOTTA salt.  You likely do not need to call your people and ask them to prove that their work is up to snuff every other day or even weekly.  And certainly not every time some idiot manages to run a script that spits out a boilerplate email suggesting there might be an issue with your SEO or website. Now there are SOME of you out there that probably SHOULD ask their peeps what the heck they did for you.  If your site is lingering beyond page 5 for every term, you probably SHOULD have a chat, change your strategy, or change your SEO/Web company.  If you have some SEO work going on and you’re not appearing SOMEWHERE in first position (or at least a good top 5 if it’s competitive) for SOMETHING with keywords at LEAST in the 3-4 word length range – like “computer repair clayton” (3 words), THEN worry. And THEN chat with them.

Short of that, don’t pay much more than a passing glance to these bs SEO come-ons.  I get at least 3 per day and I know they’re BS.  I’m sharing this as a public service announcement.

Phwew.  I feel much better now – thanks for the bully pulpit.  That one’s been building for a while.  You should see the fun I have when these idiots actually call me on the phone.